The following article is a hilarious way
of expressing one’s anger about the Business Systems present in India! How
the Common Man IS fooled day in & day out is clearly depicted in
this essay on business! The satirical treatment of the subject makes us aware
of the traps deftly hidden in the so called business and makes us aware of the
tricks of the so called Trade & Business Practices!
When Mr.Johnson.V (Founder Director Of
Johnson’s Spoken English Course) says “Q: What is it that is done when one cheats, tricks &
dupes, in India?! And the very correct answer is A: Business!” we, the common men of India understand, beyond any doubt,
that we all are taken for a ride almost every moment of our life & we are
shamelessly tricked, duped & cheated for the SOLE benefit of the so called
businessmen of Our Great India!
JSEC – UR ENGLISH
MADE EC – SINCE 1990, wishes you a great reading!
Posted On WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY
2, 2011
CHEAT, TRICK, DUPE - THE WAY WE DO BUSINESS IN INDIA!
CHEAT....CHEAT.....CHEAT.....TRICK......TRICK.......TRICK.......DUPE.....DUPE......DUPE.......!
These words & their multiple synonyms have become the real time substitutes
for Business or Doing Business in India! These
are the only things which one should have to start a business these days! And,
these are THE ONLY THINGS ONE REQUIRES to start a business & run it for
ages & amass huge profits etc! Whatever
business you do, you SHOULD IMPLEMENT 100% WORDS SUCH AS CHEAT, TRICK &
DUPE etc or else you better think of anything else other than business or doing
business! It is not a
panchayat phrase or a district one....IT IS IMPLEMENTED ALL OVER INDIA TO THE
BENEFIT OF THE POOR & STARVING BUSINESS MEN! Even such a question &
answer duo have surfaced & got into the CAT, MAT, IAS, IPS & the like
quality exams; it goes as this.....Q: What is it that is done when one
cheats, tricks & dupes, in India?! And the very correct answer is A:
Business!
From multi million dollar companies to the small pan-tea wallah follow this principle dutifully that WE, THE PEOPLE OF INDIA, SOMEHOW REACHED THE TWENTIFIRST CENTURY WITH A "BANG"; HAVE EVER THOUGHT OF WHAT IT WOULD HAVE BEEN IF THE BUSINEESSMEN OF India never implemented these words & their first cousins? It should have been total chaos, trillions of debt, poverty, illnesses, famine -like the one happened in Ethiopia!!- drought, plague & what not?! India should have sunk deep into the depths of the Mariana Trench with all her people & the multi billion dollar business institutions like the pan-cigarette-tea wallah on the four-wheeler cycle & the broad & the not-so-broad band people! Hundreds & thousands of beverage shops, adulterated goods factories all over India, drug (like the innocent opium, ganja, charas, brown-sugar etc!) manufacturing & distribution factories & networks, which all help develop & maintain the National Coffers (Coffins?!) full will get annihilated in seconds & the nation itself will vanish from the face of the Earth, if the business & business people fail to use these above stated words or their synonyms! Hence, to avoid the disastrous & make the human beings in India prosper & move into the 22nd century - remember there was no vicious thinking in all these cases! - our business people single-mindedly & with (w)hole-hearted commitment implement/ed all these words 100% in whatever they do/did!
The non-pirated + legal + moral + in hundred ways eminently qualified- some of them even have Doctorates & PhDs attached to their names to have a sheet of self-confidence! - CD/DVD sellers with HUGE BRAND NAMEs & the so-called pan-India presence have been selling (or put better, thrust down the throat of THE SO-CALLED QUALITY-CONSCIOUS & BRAND-CONSCIOUS CUSTOMER!) their CDs & DVDs in 2 or 3 plastic covers from time immemorial in addition to the plastic covers they generously give away to their DEAR & SPECIAL CUSTOMERS – Read one & all! – @ the billing counters, when they buy one or more CDs or DVDs! These GOOD GUYS put Rs.150/- sticker on the original price-tag of M.R.P Rs 99/- & sell the CDs of a movie @ A HUGE DISCOUNT OF Rs. 75/- ONLY to the HUGELY GULLIBLE BRAND & QUALITY CONSCIOUS ANTI-PIRACY CUSTOMERS, who always walk straight-jacketed & only SPRINKLE SMILES! These straight businessmen with A HUGE BRAND NAMES sell VCDs in newly-designed plastic covers -1, 2 OR 3! - printing attractive things like ‘Brazil, France, London, Japan, Scandinavia etc’, for MUCH DISCOUNTED PRICE, ONLY TO BE OPENED IN ONE’S OWN RESIDENCE TO FIND OUT THE ‘QUALITY CONTENT’ WAS SHOT/RECORDED AT THE LEAST 15-20 YEARS BACK & WHAT ONE SEES WAS THE STATE/PLACE‘JUST 20 YEARS AGO ONLY’!
From multi million dollar companies to the small pan-tea wallah follow this principle dutifully that WE, THE PEOPLE OF INDIA, SOMEHOW REACHED THE TWENTIFIRST CENTURY WITH A "BANG"; HAVE EVER THOUGHT OF WHAT IT WOULD HAVE BEEN IF THE BUSINEESSMEN OF India never implemented these words & their first cousins? It should have been total chaos, trillions of debt, poverty, illnesses, famine -like the one happened in Ethiopia!!- drought, plague & what not?! India should have sunk deep into the depths of the Mariana Trench with all her people & the multi billion dollar business institutions like the pan-cigarette-tea wallah on the four-wheeler cycle & the broad & the not-so-broad band people! Hundreds & thousands of beverage shops, adulterated goods factories all over India, drug (like the innocent opium, ganja, charas, brown-sugar etc!) manufacturing & distribution factories & networks, which all help develop & maintain the National Coffers (Coffins?!) full will get annihilated in seconds & the nation itself will vanish from the face of the Earth, if the business & business people fail to use these above stated words or their synonyms! Hence, to avoid the disastrous & make the human beings in India prosper & move into the 22nd century - remember there was no vicious thinking in all these cases! - our business people single-mindedly & with (w)hole-hearted commitment implement/ed all these words 100% in whatever they do/did!
The non-pirated + legal + moral + in hundred ways eminently qualified- some of them even have Doctorates & PhDs attached to their names to have a sheet of self-confidence! - CD/DVD sellers with HUGE BRAND NAMEs & the so-called pan-India presence have been selling (or put better, thrust down the throat of THE SO-CALLED QUALITY-CONSCIOUS & BRAND-CONSCIOUS CUSTOMER!) their CDs & DVDs in 2 or 3 plastic covers from time immemorial in addition to the plastic covers they generously give away to their DEAR & SPECIAL CUSTOMERS – Read one & all! – @ the billing counters, when they buy one or more CDs or DVDs! These GOOD GUYS put Rs.150/- sticker on the original price-tag of M.R.P Rs 99/- & sell the CDs of a movie @ A HUGE DISCOUNT OF Rs. 75/- ONLY to the HUGELY GULLIBLE BRAND & QUALITY CONSCIOUS ANTI-PIRACY CUSTOMERS, who always walk straight-jacketed & only SPRINKLE SMILES! These straight businessmen with A HUGE BRAND NAMES sell VCDs in newly-designed plastic covers -1, 2 OR 3! - printing attractive things like ‘Brazil, France, London, Japan, Scandinavia etc’, for MUCH DISCOUNTED PRICE, ONLY TO BE OPENED IN ONE’S OWN RESIDENCE TO FIND OUT THE ‘QUALITY CONTENT’ WAS SHOT/RECORDED AT THE LEAST 15-20 YEARS BACK & WHAT ONE SEES WAS THE STATE/PLACE‘JUST 20 YEARS AGO ONLY’!
..........................................................Full
Article HERE!
